How did mothers of 1970’s discipline their children?

Certainly not by trying to indulge them or find something fun for them to engage in. They’d just lock you out and watch television until you came to your senses. Sure, they loved their kids with every ounce of humanity in them, but they saw things differently when it came to raising them to be... ...
Certainly not by trying to indulge them or find something fun for them to engage in. They’d just lock you out and watch television until you came to your senses. Sure, they loved their kids with every ounce of humanity in them, but they saw things differently when it came to raising them to be ‘proper people’.

Jen Hatmaker, a contributor to the Today Community believes that parents indulge their kids way too much nowadays. In an article published on the website, the 45-year-old mom of five explains that her own mom raised them as kids with an iron fist and a will to embolden.
How did mothers of 1970’s discipline their children?
“This very morning, a mom posted how on her son’s birthday, she assembles a comprehensive “time capsule” including items, photos, and products related to that particular year, stores it in a set of antique trunks, and plans to present them all to him on his 18th birthday as a tribute to his entire life,” she wrote.

She found this shocking and completely foreign. Her mom never did things like that. She’s not saying it’s a bad thing. She’s only stressing the fact that the methods of raising kids nowadays and back in the days are utterly different, and perhaps, upsettingly so.

Time value of discipline

Jen attributes this difference to the notion modern-day parents have about their kids. They usually feel that it is the sole responsibility, duty, and obligation of the parents to give their kids a magical life, even beyond adulthood. Parents believe that their kids’ lives have to be “a beautifully documented fairytale in which they reside as the center of the universe, their success is manufactured (or guaranteed), and we over-attend to every detail of their lives until we send them off to college after writing their entrance essays.”
How did mothers of 1970’s discipline their children?

It’s okay for parents to want the best for their kids. Heck, it’s perfectly natural to try to give them the world if you could. Unfortunately, this can be sometimes destructive, if not all the time. Your kids won’t be able to stand on their own two feet and conquer the world if they are thrown into battle with it.

Parents usually spiral into major guilt when they believe they are not doing the best they can for their children. If the idea of giving it all centers around filing antique trunks every year, then our modern-day beliefs are really very porous.

What would my mom do?

Jen describes the above question as her “trick for keeping the joy and losing the stress.”

“I was born in 1974, good readers,” she wrote. “It no more occurred to my mom to coddle us Precious Snowflakes than it did to quit drinking a case of Tab a day. If you told my mom to craft a yearly time capsule for each child to store until graduation, she would have cried tears of laughter all the way to Jazzercise.”

She often finds herself worrying about how she’d keep her kids occupied during the summer, so their IQs don’t drop down a couple of levels while they sit around and watch too much television than is humanly possible. They spend so much time playing video games and sleeping in that she worries she’s not doing enough to make them productive. She’s a working mom who has to ensure that her kids are busy being productive readers and innovators fourteen hours.

Then she remembers, her mom didn’t raise her under all these ridiculous kinds of pressure, and she turned out okay. So she’ll think: What would her mom do?

“It never crossed my mom’s mind to “entertain us” or “fund expensive summer endeavors” or “create stimulating activities for our brain development.” She said ‘get the hell outside’, and we did. We made up games and rode our bikes and choreographed dance routines and drank out of the hose when we got thirsty. I swear, my mom did not know where we actually were half the time,” she explained

Never once did she feel neglected

“We knew we were loved and we knew we were safe. We never doubted the most important parts of the story.”

It’s important to let your kids fail sometimes. Life is not a bed of smooth pink roses, laid out on a cloud. Perfect childhoods shouldn’t even exist. Kids should be corrected when they are wrong, and you shouldn’t always agree to provide their every single random demand. This will make them dependent on you, even when they are supposed to be striking out on their own.

“Have we forgotten the benefit of letting our kids fail? Figure it out? Work hard for it? Entertain themselves?” she asked. “We put so much undue pressure on ourselves to curate Magical Childhoods, when in fact, kids are quite capable of being happy kids without constant adult administration. I would argue that making them the center of the universe is actually terribly detrimental.”

So, whenever we feel as though our efforts are diminishing, we should ask ourselves what our own moms would have done. Don’t always try to solve everything for them. Teach them, educate them, nourish them with wise words and let them take on the world. Allow them to use their imagination. Let them get their hands dirty while being innovative, creative, and happy.

Jen was told by her friends who are educators that kids need to be pampered a little, so they can learn to watch out them for themselves. Dependence on parents is so bad that a lot of kids can’t even fill a form on their own.

“You have everything your little ones need: kisses, Shel Silverstein books, silly songs, kitchen dance parties, a backyard, family dinner around the table, and a cozy lap,” she wrote. “They’ll fill in the rest of the gaps and be better for it. Your kids don’t need to be entertained and they don’t need to be bubble-wrapped; they just need to be loved.”